Reenlistment

Today my husband reenlisted for two extra years. He still has close to two years on his contract and so he now has 4 years left until he gets out of the army. But that will put him in for 10 years and so we will see what happens closer to that time. But if we want our plans to begin to work then this was necessary. That and the economy being what it is. But it is just what it is at the moment. So we will see how this goes. I am happy but it is sad that we are still so reliant on the military for our wellbeing. More time away from one another and from the children. But there are too many pros currently. Only time will tell.

We have a plan, hopefully

So Chris and I have a plan and this plan will only work if I have a teaching position and if he stays in the army another few years after his current contract. But it's a plan we are both really excited about and something we truly believe is the right thing for us. Hopefully I will find out within a month or so if I have a job for the fall and he will know soon about reenlistment.

We want to buy some land about two miles up the road and build a house. We wanted 5 acres but we are only going to be able to get 2 from the people we want the land from. But instead of having the extra room for the horses, we can use their land for our horses that we want to have. I only want two horses, one for me and one for Whytney. Well Whytney's horse will most likely be boarded where she rides during the week but that will be a long time before we can afford that. It is a plan that involves a lot of work and a lot of cutting down on things so we can pay bills but it is the best thing for us. I really love it here and don't want to move. I want to teach here and just be happy. And that is what Chris wants too. He can reup for where he is at now and we can still see each other on the weekends unless he is deployed or whatever. But again, this is not set in stone as I do not have a job yet and we don't know about his reenlistment yet.

On that note, we don't get to see him this weekend. He found out today he had staff duty and then found out they changed it from a 24 hr shift to three 8 hour shifts for seven days. So he is working through next Monday. It's retarded but hey, not much we can do. It gives him time to practice the song he's singing at church on June 7th and also to learn the song that we are going to sing together at church.

Life is hard but it's what it is. I hope that this plan works for us, but it may not be God's plan. We will have to continue to pray and see what God's plan is.

Been hectic

Things have been very hectic around here this week. With the funeral yesterday and stuff, things have been rough. But while bad things have been happening, today I found out that I passed my early childhood education test. So now I will be both elementary and early childhood certified. And that makes me a bit more marketable. So hopefully I will be able to find something.

With Chris leaving soon I need to work. But even though I need to keep busy, that is not the reason I feel as though I belong in a classroom. I know that is my calling. That God put this in my path and it is where I am meant to be. I am also considering going back to get my degree in biblical studies so I am more prepared and can teach sunday school to the youth. I want to be involved as much as I can in the new church that is preparing to begin. But we shall see.

Germany squashed

Today I squashed the potential move to Germany. I told Chris that he could reup but it had to be for where he's at now or the base that is closer to here than where he's at now. My youngest daughter's godmother is here and honestly she is one of the greatest people I have ever met. She has been a mother to me when I needed it, a friend always, and a sister as well. And since the events that happened yesterday afternoon and the loss that she has incurred, I know that I can't leave here. We are happy here and we love where we live. We have a great church family and we have finally found a place where all of us know that it is where we belong. Moving would do nothing for us and possibly make us miserable. And maybe Chris staying in isn't the best thing for us. We will figure something out, no matter what it is. We have one year and 11 months until he gets out of the army so I think we can figure it all out before then.

Germany

So Chris has been talking about reenlisting and going back to Germany. This time we would be together and the girls would get a chance to really live in a different culture. While Whytney got to experience a little of it before, she would really get a much bigger chance this time. I told him that if we do this and we go back after he gets back from his deployment that we aren't going to sit around and do nothing this time. That this time we are going to take advantage of being over there and really travel and do things. But right now it's just a thought and who knows what will actually happen.

I really want to teach and I hope that I get the chance to teach over there on post. I could and that is a great thing. If I can't teach right away I can get a job doing something else on post until a position opens up. And the nice part about the military in that way is that people are always leaving. But time will tell and we are praying about it and trying to figure out what the best thing for our family is.

I am already far from most of my family and if we did go we would take my dad with us if he wanted to go. We would sell our house here and we would live on post. The girls would have a great time and Whytney would get to live in the country she loves most. Whytney loves the germany culture and wants to speak it fluently. There are a lot of pros and I know there are plenty of cons. But the economy is so bad right now that Chris getting out of the army is one of the scariest things that we face since it's one of the only guaranteed jobs out there.

Dating in Germany

Chris and I really began dating in Germany. We were stationed at different places, about an hour away from one another. Each weekend he would take the train and stay with me and Whytney where we lived. He lived in the barracks on his post and we had an apartment so it was easier that way. On occassion we would take him home on Sundays because the big PX was where he was at. It was interesting being in a different country and there were a lot of distractions that made life difficult on us.

Chris and I broke up more times than I care to count. We never partied together and the one time we did go out, we went to separate places but kept in touch on the phone. We never really went out on "dates". That wasn't an easy thing to do with a kindergardener and me being as strict as I was about who watched her. The guy that lived below me watched her two times. One was because of a company dinner and the other was the time I took Chris to the emergency room at the krackenhouse (hospital) because he split his head open and needed stitches.

We got engaged about five months of dating. This was very quick and many people did not agree with this. His supervisor even had a talk with him and this prompted Chris to never speak to the man again outside of work. We planned our wedding for one year after our engagement. We were supposed to be married on April 23, 2006. This was to be the 31st wedding anniversary of my parents. But things happened and we decided to not get married at that time.

After much trying, we decided that a fertility specialist was needed to help us have a baby. I went to the specialist, found out I had something wrong with my uterus and the doctor said that he was going to do additional testing. That testing was never done because two weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I chose to get out of the army since I had been deployed with Whytney and did not want us both to be deployed having a baby at home. I got out of the army that November and moved back to California. Chris came a month later and we got married. We went to the civil union place and got married without anyone there. While that was the best choice for us at the time, I can't wait to renew our vows with our friends and family there.

Chris was stationed in Germany for another two years. He finally got out of Germany in March of 2008 and has been in Georgia ever since.

And now we are considering reenlistment and going back to Germany as a family. And this time I hope that we take the time to really travel and see the things that we should have seen when we were there the last time.

A poem for a daddy

This was posted on Facebook on the armywives group.


My daddy is a soldier
he's often gone away
to some far off country
where he has to stay.
I really miss my daddy
and I'm not sure what he does
except he helps other people.

At night when I say my prayers
I ask to keep daddy safe
so that he can come home to us
and sit in his favorite place.

Some nights I can hear mommy cry
when she think's I am asleep
I know she misses daddy
and her sadness hurts real deep.

I know that a day may come
when daddy won't come home
and it scares me even thinking
that we will be alone.

My daddy is a soldier
he's often gone away
And I am so very proud of him
each and every day.

Come home to us daddy
When your job is done
I know that those people need you
But they aren't the only ones.

Possibilities

Lately things have been really stressful in many ways. Yesterday I was gone most of the day in Georgia visiting my husband. We had to take care of a few things as far as tricare and DEERS is concerned so I drove there. We got to eat lunch together and that was really nice. And we bought Whytney a PSP for getting stellar grades for the entire school year. She is such a great student. Last night Whytney went to the middle school to pick out what instrument she will play in band next year. After trying every instrument there and finding out a couple of them she wasn't meant for, she picked the flute. It was not on her list of wanting to play but that ended up being the best fit for her. So she will start that when the school year starts up again in August.

My biggest stressor is and always has been finances. When things aren't good then I freak out and stay that way until they get better. It is just that now they don't seem to be getting better but stay bad continually. I am trying so hard to find a teaching job but the economy is bad and the governor here doesn't want the stimulus money so school districts are laying off teachers. If they are getting laid off then there isn't going to be any hiring of new teachers. Chris goes to Iraq in a few months and while that will be a slight influx in pay, it won't be enough to pay off things that need to be paid off. He wants to get out of the army in two years and unless I am teaching fulltime I don't see how that is possible. But things happen the way they are meant to and so we will just have to wait and see.

Life is hard when you are the one at home. I know that everyone talks about how hard it is for the soldier, but I believe that this side of it, being the wife at home, is much worse. I've been the soldier in Iraq so I can actually compare the two, which helps. But I am here alone with three children taking care of everything. My husband said when he was home on leave that he sees now why I get frustrated and get upset with him sometimes. I'm glad he sees the daily grind I deal with because it helps him to understand.

Now, if I could just calm down a bit and really try and figure some things out.

Today

Today is difficult for me. I emailed the principal where I student taught asking him to contact a few schools and talk me up so that hopefully I can get an interview somewhere. I interviewed with him but I'm not too hopeful about that now. I was but I have a feeling and it's not a good one. With Chris deploying, I desperately need to be working everyday. I need something to keep my mind off of him being gone. If it comes down to it, I am going to apply at preschools since I am going to be early childhood certified as well. But we will see what happens. I did call one school and the principal was so nice but the only opening she had was for a Spanish teacher. I have applied at many places but it just doesn't seem too hopeful at the moment.

I haven't heard anything back yet about whether or not we can file for the adoption right now. We will do eventually regardless, but we are hoping that Chris's dad gets permission to file pro bono so we can do it now and not have to wait. I'm afraid if we wait too long that her bio father will change his mind and not agree to just signing the papers. I want this to go as smoothly as possible. Chris is her dad, nobody else. And that isn't going to change regardless of whether or not she gets his last name.

Adoption

So today I talked to Chris's dad who is a lawyer. Chris has wanted to adopt my daughter Whytney since we were dating. Well, his dad is going to talk to the partner at the law firm he works at to get permission to file pro bono and when he gets it we are filing for him to adopt Whytney. This is what Whytney wants and it's great. Whytney's biological father told us that he will sign the paperwork and won't fight it so that is even better news. Whytney is so excited. She said that now she can tell kids that Chris is her real father instead of calling him dad and having them say, no he's just your stepdad. He's been in her life for more than half of it and she's almost 10 years old. Paul decided to be a father about a year ago now and he was never in her life previous to that. He understands that Chris is her dad and he even said that Chris is a great guy and knows that Whytney will be loved. Chris has always thought of Whytney as his own and has never once thought of her differently than he has Meadow and Lizzie. So I just pray that this happens before he leaves for Iraq so that it is finished and Whytney can finally have a "real dad" that never goes anywhere and is always in her life.

Preparing for deployment

Today my husband is doing layouts and they are taking count so they can prepare for deployment. Things are quickly changing for him and he told me yesterday that while he was gone for those two weeks, a bunch of new people have showed up and are now in his unit. So it's definitely almost time for him to leave again. This is something that we have been through before, but the last time we were separated already since I was in California and have just had Meadow and Chris was stationed in Germany. His deployment then was delayed three months, and this time it was moved up four months. So we will have time together before he leaves on the weekends when he is home. Then I will be on my own and he will be on his own over there. But we will stay strong and through our relationship with one another, and our relationship with the Lord we will make it through this and be stronger on the other side.

It's a few months from his next deployment

My husband just went back to work after being on leave for two weeks. He is going to take more leave when their block leave happens before they deploy so that we can have a little more time together. The past two weeks were incredible and we loved being together as a family all the time. Today I am sitting here trying to figure out how I am going to survive another year without my husband, this time with three children. I love my girls, but it is very hard to do things on my own on a day to day basis. But I am learning slowly and I will continue to learn and will be okay. The last deployment was 15 months and I'm hoping this one coming will not be as long. And hopefully he will be able to get out of the army when his time is up. But that depends on me and my situation as far as teaching goes. I am still hoping for a position for the fall, but only time will tell on that. If not this fall, then hopefully the next year. There are so many things my girls would love to do but are not able to because of our situation. If I am working then things will be easier for all of us.

How we met/all of our encounters until we began dating

In June of 2004, I was sitting in the "office" working on about five different computers. I was a network administrator in the army and at the time I was fixing all these computers that were messed up. The NCO of the Sen team came in and introduced me to his new soldier. The SEN team is who provided us with internet and phone service so I worked very closely with them. I stood up, met my future husband, and turned away and didn't give him a second look.

About a month after that, I was walking to the gym with a guy who I worked out with daily. I saw this guy, totally forgetting he was the new soldier on the SEN team, doing backflips off of the concrete bunkers we used to shield us from the mortar rounds that were being fired at us. I looked up, immediately thought that he was a moron, and just kept walking. Never spoke to him and honestly never believed that I would ever have to unless I needed to talk to him about work stuff.

Fast forward to November 2004. I was having a very bad night and so I went to go see my friend Brian. He happened to live in the same room as this guy I had seen a couple times. I was complaining about how some guy I liked said I wasn't dateable. Chris popped up out of nowhere and said, "You're not dateable, you're marriable." I gave him this look that expressed my utter confusion and dismissed it like it was nothing. I turned back to my friend and just kept talkin to him. Oh, little did I know what the future would hold.

In December 2004 the SEN team's replacements had arrived. It turned out that one of the guys that was there replacing them was someone I was very close with in basic training. I was in their room one night with Kurtis talking to him and my friend Brian. Chris got all upset I guess because he realized I liked short, blonde guys and so he loudly announced he was going to bed. He took his shirt off and I saw his tattoo. I noticed it and complimented him on it. I think I shocked him so badly by speaking to him that he couldn't talk back. LOL.

Two days later Chris and I started actually talking and we realized that we had a connection. We spent the rest of his time in Iraq together and he left for Germany and we emailed one another. I got sent to Kuwait for a month after Iraq and then when I returned to Germany I finally got to see him after I got back off of leave. I had gone to California to pick up Whytney and so he got to meet her then as well. He loved her right away.

More to come......

Creation of the blog

I am creating this blog and writing about the daily life of being an army wife. This is mainly going to be my outlet so that I am able to get out my frustrations and talk about my husband, my family and about how being a soldier's wife is very different than being a normal wife. While I can't wait for the day that I am no longer an army wife, I know that these years I am spending will never leave my mind and that I will always be more appreciative of my husband because of all that we have gone through.

Chris is about to leave again on his 3rd deployment. This is our 2nd deployment as a married couple, as the 1st time we were deployed together and that is where we met. I am going to talk a lot about how we met, our life as a dating couple and then throughout our married life so far. Each day will present new information and I am very excited to write it all down and have a record of it. This is something I have not done yet and I think that it will be good to do it.

But for now, it's late and I'm sleepy.